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0:00if you are or want to be
0:01with a person with avoidative attachment
0:02where he worked
0:03not to talk about their emotions
0:04distances itself when
0:05there are conflicts or it seems that
0:07doesn't care how you feel
0:08I pass on the tips for
0:09have a healthy relationship
0:10and don't end up frustrated
0:11someone with avoidant attachment
0:13needs space and clarity
0:15so as not to feel pressured
0:17this means that if you constantly
0:18you ask him how you feel about being okay
0:20what's up how you feel
0:21may feel invaded
0:23and move further away
0:24does not mean what to do
0:25aside your emotions
0:26not to scare him away okay
0:27but to address the conversations
0:29in a calm manner
0:30and without bragging
0:30point out or judge
0:31people with avoidant attachment
0:33are often
0:34and communication is perceived
0:35as an emotional confrontation
0:37to better connect with
0:38they be clear and direct
0:40but avoid asking questions
0:41or comments that appear to be demanding
0:43e.g. instead of
0:44to say but why
0:45you didn't answer me all day
0:46is that you don't care anymore
0:47try with hey I know that
0:49was busy alone
0:50I wanted to know if you were okay
0:51hope you had a nice day
0:53tell me whenever you want or for example
0:54if you notice that your partner
0:55or you almost something is distant
0:57after a fight
0:58instead of insisting
0:59with messages and calls
1:00you can tell him how
1:01you said you need your space
1:03let me know when
1:03you want to talk about it I am here
1:05this gives you the opportunity to process
1:07their emotions without feeling
1:09who are being forced to respond
1:11the worst you can
1:12make an avoidant
1:12is to require you to process
1:14at the same speed
1:14that you emotions
1:15because it is going to close more
1:17and let's see,
1:17it's not your fault
1:18this is how they have
1:19came out to deal with the conflict
1:21I am telling you this from experience
1:22an example of what
1:23you can say it's like hey
1:24today I am free in case
1:25you want to spend time together
1:27but if you prefer to spend the day alone
1:28well,
1:29I understand it too
1:30consistency is not your
1:31responsibility to manage
1:32your emotional distance
1:34that's their job
1:35but it is an emotional responsibility
1:37give them space to process
1:39while maintaining
1:40open communication
1:41and you don't make them feel
1:42guilty of
1:43need that distance
1:45and above all to be
1:45consistent with your messages
1:47of affection and support
1:48that is, if you show
1:49understanding and patience
1:50little by little they
1:51will learn to trust
1:52and open up more emotionally to you
1:54the truth is that it is going to be a
1:56little like with tweezers
1:57but only at the beginning
1:58an avoidant couple
2:00does not flee for lack of
2:01connection as paradise
2:02but for fear of being
2:03injured or lose their
2:04independence emotional validation
2:06avoidative attachment
2:07usually comes from past experiences
2:09where their parents or
2:10caregivers perhaps
2:10were cold or distant
2:12or rejected their needs
2:14for example if as a child
2:15expressed as sadness or fear
2:17for it may have been ignored
2:18or and told
2:19phrases like ay ya
2:20stop crying
2:21it's no big deal or be strong
2:23showing emotions was
2:24seen as a weakness
2:26so validate
2:26does not mean
2:27that you have to insist
2:29in talking about their feelings
2:30all the time
2:30but to give them space
2:32to express themselves when
2:33feel comfortable
2:34and show them that it is safe to do so
2:36for example,
2:36if they share
2:37something personal you can say as of
2:38hey thank you very much for trusting me
2:40I value this very much
2:41I guess this is
2:42difficult for you here I am
2:44to listen to you whenever you want
2:45also recognize their form of love
2:47the avoidant is not always
2:48will show you his affection
2:49verbally or emotionally
2:51but that doesn't mean they are not sorry
2:53they usually demonstrate
2:54love with practical acts
2:56how to invent something for you
2:57do you a favor
2:58or simply share
2:59time together without need
3:00of talking too much
3:01then recognizes these gestures
3:03and responds with tokens of appreciation
3:04for example you can
3:05tell him how to hey
3:06I know you don't like it
3:07a lot of talking about those things
3:08but I want
3:08know that I appreciate it very much
3:09everything you do
3:10to me means a lot
3:11builds security
3:13I have already said it
3:13but avoidant attachment
3:14needs time to
3:16fully trust someone
3:17if you are consistent do not forget them
3:19you do not judge them
3:20for more easily
3:21will be able to be opened
3:22with you patience and empathy
3:24recalls that distancing
3:25of your partner is not a tribute to you
3:28is a reaction from
3:29their own fear of vulnerability
3:31and to lose its independence
3:32what you do yes
3:33has an impact on them
3:34and be patient while
3:36you work in building
3:37a basis of mutual trust
3:38will make all the difference
3:40I promise you
3:41say things like what to see
3:43I know that sometimes
3:43you need time for yourself
3:45I understand and I want
3:46know that I am here
3:47when you need it
3:48but it is important to me to talk about it
3:49if you have a partner
3:50with habitat attachment
3:51or are you the person
3:52with avoidant attachment
3:53tell us about your hacks
3:54to have a healthy and beautiful relationship
3:56so we all pass on advice to each other
3:58follow my profile for more
3:59content on attachment and relationship
4:00thank you very much for your support hug
